I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
