is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Randomize