Life is so much better after having sex.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
