so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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