After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize