dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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