its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
