she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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