I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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