I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
high people should be assigned attendants
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Randomize
