id be glad to
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
