You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
