dude you need to get laid
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?