I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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