check it out our google latitudes are spooning
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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