I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
