Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize