kristin has been a bad kristin
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
