I don't usually arrange sex via text message
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
