How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
After tacos, we're chasing women.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize