Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
