Screwed.edu
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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