Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
