Sponge bath it is.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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