someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize