Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize