She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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