whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I fill condoms, not promises.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize