You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
