Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
