Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
