I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Me. At least after what I've been through.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
