The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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