Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
We need to get me chipped asap
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
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