i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
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she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?