Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
