She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
