i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
