I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Dicks are not precious.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
