Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
