whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
