my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
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I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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