Duck Duck Cougar?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
