My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
