so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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