im gay
i know
yea but for you.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
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