Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
The air was thick with penises
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
