i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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