so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
