Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
