I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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