Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
You did what with his pubic hair?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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